Dudes and dildos often don’t mix together. It’s because straight men think that (1) it wouldn’t benefit them and (2) only gay men are playing with dongs. Those two points couldn’t be far from the truth, as anyone can use a dildo. So for the men out there who are curious, this is your sign to try it out. Come on, there are many online sex stores if you don’t want to have some awkward convo inside a sex shop. Order a dong online and explore its depths— it’s about damn time!
Learn about the benefits of dildo play, the best techniques, and other information that you may need to know in this guide.
Why Men Should Try a Dildo
One of the common misconceptions about dildos is that only people with vaginas would appreciate it. After all, its curved shaft and tapered tip are specially made for the g-spot. But surprise, surprise! Studies and sexual wellness experts show that a dildo can bring delightful pleasure to people with penises. How so? Well…
1It stimulates the prostate gland or the “male g-spot.”
Did you know that using a dildo can give men full-bodied orgasms?
There’s an organ inside the anus called the prostate gland or p-spot. It’s small and walnut-sized, located right below the bladder. It’s responsible for semen production and is incredibly sensitive.
Stimulating it directly through the rectum or indirectly through the perineum can bring sexual pleasure and even intense orgasms.That’s why you’ve got to try dildos at least once. Who knows? Maybe you’ll experience the best orgasm of your life through dildo play.
However, it’s also important to note that not all men enjoy prostate stimulation. If you’re one of them, try other sex toys instead. We all have unique preferences, so there is no need to force yourself to use a dildo for men.
2It adds variety to your sexual routine.
It’s fun to use masturbators and fleshlights… but sometimes things can get pretty stale. That’s why you’ve got to try something new every now and then, and that includes dildo play. Like with other love toys, they come in different sizes, shapes, materials, and features, so there’s a lot to explore.
You can also incorporate this in your partnered plays if your partner is open to it. For instance, you can ask your partner to peg you or use it to try double penetration.
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3If you’re a submissive, it can fulfill your dom-pegging-sub fantasies.
If you like being dominated in the bedroom, a dildo may help you. Nothing says full submission than getting on all fours while a big cock is rammed inside your bum. You can also use this as a starting point for pegging, a sexual act involving a female partner penetrating their male partner with a strap-on dong. Once you’ve determined to enjoy dildo play, you can start discussing it with your partner.
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4It can help men with erectile dysfunction or similar conditions.
In some cases, men who have erectile dysfunction or have difficulty having a hard-on may use dildos to continue sexual activity with their partner. They may wear a strap-on dildo to vaginally or anally penetrate their partner, or they can also use the dildo on themselves to get their orgasmic fix.
5It can improve your sexual performance.
Dildos aren’t just made for pleasure; they can also improve sexual stamina! Some say that dildos have helped them control their ejaculation, lasting longer during intercourse. There are also some cases where the men who’ve tried dildos have increased their confidence during partnered sexual activities since they’ve become more accustomed to their bodies and pleasure.
“Will Dildos Make Men Gay?”
Short answer, no.
We understand why you would feel this way, as anal play is mostly done by homosexual couples. But seriously, your preferred sexual activities have nothing to do with your sexual orientation.
Remember that sexual orientation refers to emotional, romantic, and sexual attraction to people of the same gender, different gender, or multiple genders. It’s not influenced by the use of dongs or other sexual practices. Wanting something in your ass doesn’t make you suddenly fall in love with men if you’re attracted to women. You love anal stimulation, that’s all.
How to Use a Dildo for Men: Common Techniques
Got your dildo? Great! We understand if you’re nervous, but trust us, you’ll soon learn the ropes of dildo play. But before you start pushing that dong in your anus, here are some quick reminders.
- Use lube, like lots of them. If the dildo is made of silicone, stick to water-based ones. If it’s glass or stainless steel, use silicone or hybrid-based lubricant.
- Take it slow. There’s a learning curve when you use a dildo for men. Get into a reasonable pace, then increase it gradually.
- Don’t follow everything you see in porn. The people involved in those videos are professionals. Go with positions and techniques you’re comfortable with.
Now that the quickie reminders are said, into the techniques we go!
1Please the Perineum
Start with warming up your prostate gland by indirectly stimulating it. For this technique, you’ll press the perineum, the sensitive area between the scrotum and anus, with the tip of the dildo. Apply gentle pressure as you move the tip up and down or side by side.
2Gentle Poke
Here’s another technique to build anticipation. You need to gently press the dildo at the opening of your anus. Don’t insert it yet; play it around the hole. Enjoy the tingly sensations as your bum gets ready to be penetrated.
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3In and Out
Once you’re ready for penetration, hold the base of the dildo, and move the dildo back and forth. You can start with slow and shallow thrusts, then gradually quicken and deepen them as you continue the deed.
You may expect discomfort while inserting the dildo in your bum, especially if you do it the first time, but it shouldn’t be extremely painful. If the pain is becoming unbearable, stop the deed and take a moment to assess if it’s because of probable cause.
4Press the P-Spot
If you want to make the most of your dildo, we highly recommend this technique. For this one, you’ll need to locate your prostate gland first. Apply lubricant to your middle finger and try to feel it out. It should be located below the bladder and in front of the rectum. You may also feel a subtle tingle when you’ve touched the area since it’s sensitive.
Once you’ve figured out the location of your prostate gland, you can then use the tapered tip of the dildo to apply gentle pressure on the area. When inserting the dildo, the tip should be pressed at the prostate gland. Move the toy back and forth, always pressed on the p-spot throughout the deed. You can also make a rubbing motion (up and down) on the prostate gland without doing any back-and-forth movements. It’s all up to you.
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5Sensual Swirl
For this technique, you’ll move the toy in and out of your anus, but you’ll make some twisting or rotating motions. It adds a layer of stimulation that you may enjoy. If you find it more hassle to combine two motions simultaneously, try the other techniques in this list.
6Steady Vibes
For this technique, you’ll need a vibrating dildo. The instructions are simple: apply lubricant on the dildo and gently push it inside your anus, preferably with the tip touching your prostate gland. Once it’s all set, you can turn on the vibrations and keep it steady. Feel the pulsating pleasure taking over!
7Double O
You will need two sex toys for this one, a dildo, and a masturbator. Your dominant hand will insert the dong in your anus and move it back and forth. Meanwhile, the other one is busy stroking your penis with a masturbator. It may be tricky at first, but with enough practice, it’ll definitely leave you shaking in pleasure!
Safety Tips
After learning the basic dildo play techniques, you’re nearly ready to use your toy. But my dudes, before you go out and use your dildo for men, note the following safety measures below.
1Choose the right dildo.
The safety measures don’t actually start during the deed. It begins right when you shop for a dildo. Consider your comfort level, experience, and any specific sensations you wish to explore. For example, if you’ve never tried anal play, don’t purchase a girthy and lengthy dildo! Go with smaller ones, so your bum wouldn’t get overwhelmed.
You can also consider whether you plan to use it with a partner. For instance, if your babe is open to using dongs during sex, you can wear strap-on dildos or vibrating dongs.
Whether you prefer a realistic or non-realistic design, a curved or straight shape, or a smooth or bumpy texture, choose a dildo that aligns with your desires. You can check the suggested article below to see the different types of dildos, and help you find the dong of your dreams.
2Make the necessary preparations.
If you want your dildo plays to be as smooth as butter, you must prep! If you’re going to insert a dildo without any lube in an unwashed butt, then you’re just setting yourself up for a disaster. That said, here are some of the things you need to do before the deed:
Try the “Bottom Diet.”
If you want to avoid poop smearing all over your dildo, we recommend trying a “bottom diet.” It basically comprises foods the bottom (receiver in anal sex) should take a few days before the deed. They’re usually under the high-fiber category, so your stool will be collected into a single bulky mass.
- Recommended Foods: Artichoke, Apples, Avocado, Bananas, Carrots, Sweet potatoes, Bran flakes, Oats, Quinoa, Almonds, Black beans, Chickpeas, Chia seeds, and Pistachios.
- Foods to Avoid: Dairy, Foods with Refined Carbohydrates, Spicy Meals, and Greasy Meals.
Make sure there’s a bottle of personal lube within reach.
This is a must! The anus doesn’t self-lubricate, so it’s vital to have a lubricant to ensure a smooth and comfortable glide. Never attempt to use a dildo for men without one, as you’ll end up with anal fissures and other related injuries.
Create a distraction-free and inviting space.
Before you start the deed, settle all your responsibilities within the next hour. You sure don’t want someone knocking while you’re in the middle of anal play, do you? You can also incorporate scented candles, warm lighting, and other items that could make your room more moody and inviting.
Use condoms if needed.
If you plan to share a dildo with your partner, then it’s best to wrap condoms around the toy. This ensures easy cleanup and avoids potential bacterial infections and other related conditions.
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3Relax. That. Ass.
When your butt is too tense, it tends to clench, making it harder to insert the dildo. That’s why give enough time for foreplay. Yes, even solo plays need pre-game. You can massage your body, watch erotic videos, or lie in bed and take a few deep breaths.
It’s also important to get into the right position. Don’t mimic the ones you see in porn, as these are done by pros; go with something simple yet comfortable.
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4Explore!
Keep on exploring. Don’t stick to one position, technique, or type of dildo. Heck, don’t even stick to reading one resource about dildo play; there are tons of articles that you can check about the use of dildos for men. There’s so much more to learn, so brace yourself for the wild ride! Below are some positions you can try and sex toys you can incorporate while using a dildo.
- Suggested Positions: Lying on your back, lying on your side, getting on all fours (if the dildo has a suction cup base), getting on top (if the dildo has a suction cup base).
- Suggested Toys: Cock rings, masturbators, fleshlight, tip vibrators, etc.
Lauvette’s Top Picks: Dildos for Men
As you’ve reached the end of this guide, you’re now equipped with the techniques and tips that’ll make your dong plays exciting! To kickstart your use of a dildo for men, here are some of our top recommendations for beginners.
Takeaway
It’s pretty to use a dildo, but men are often hesitant because of the stigma surrounding dudes and dildos. But here’s the thing, if you feel secure in your sexuality, a dildo won’t change your preferences regarding emotional and sexual relationships. On the other hand, if you don’t like how it feels, then no need to force adding dildos into your sexual routine. You do you!
As for our dudes who’ve enjoyed using dildos, keep exploring and following our safety measures. Happy playing!