The World of Sex Parties: Party, Play, and Pleasure!

If you’ve never been to a sex party or sex parties, this is your sign to go to one if you have the guts. 

Like, yes, it’s exactly as it suggests. But there’s more than what meets the eye.

In this article, we’ll discuss more on what a sex party is, the different types, and even how to be a host of your own sex party. On top of this, we’ll give you some helpful tips on navigating your first experience with these sex parties.

What is A Sex Party?

Women’s Health defines a sex party as “a group of consenting adults getting together to have sex.”

They can range from chill or vanilla-style to super kinky and intense. We’ll get into those types later on.

Sex parties can be available to the open public or as private, wherein you must get an invite or hear of it by word of mouth. At these parties, you can engage in sex with anyone else present at the party. And often, there’s someone or even a crowd watching you and whoever you’re engaging the deed with if they find it entertaining. Sharing is also truly caring for this kind of event, as you can hop on to one partner after another or embark on group sex.

The key to having a happy and successful experience at a sex party is asking for permission and consent. We’re reiterating the importance of consent here, especially when numerous people are involved.

Common goers of these sex parties range from singles to people in open or ethical polyamorous relationships, as long they equally agree that they can sleep with people at the party.

But as much as a sex party implies that most or the majority of those have sex, being a viewer is also okay. Or maybe a bit of fondling, fooling around, showing off your body at your own pace amplifies the sexy mood being set.

Why Do People Go To Sex Parties

Read through this section to learn the various reasons why people go to these kinds of parties.

1 They want to try something new.

Tapping into your sexual side is all about experimentation and novelty, alongside learning and sticking to whatever sexual activities you like. But back to the former, there are so many sexual activities out there that we have yet to try. It all depends on our pace and how bold we get over the course of time. 

So if you’ve been sexually active for a long time or simply want to learn the ropes of sex right before you, attending a sex party can be your next adventure. As sex parties are consensual and often a place people feel more free to express their deepest desires, you get to see everyone’s authentic sides, even if there’s a hint of anonymity.

2 They’re eager to build connections.

Sex parties promote community, especially if the party caters to a specific kink or fetish. It creates a sense of belonging and acceptance for everyone, making them feel more comfortable to act on their urges and desires. Alongside that, they can build unique friendships or maybe something more if the connection between those involved is strong.

Sex parties are also an event where friends go and join the fun openly, and a possible date. For the latter, constant communication is important all throughout.

3 They’re in ethical non-monogamous relationships.

In this day and age, being in ethical non-monogamous relationships are more known and common. Some feel freer and more authentic to themselves as they share their love with multiple people. And in terms of sex, they can explore and satisfy more sexual activities and reach other kinds of pleasure.

Now in the context of sexual parties, they can find more consenting sexual partners with whom they can unravel their desires safely and even learn more about themselves in the process. At sex parties, you meet different people from various parties that just so happens to share a mutual liking to engage in the deed or have a relationship with more than one person. 

4 It’s a safe space.

Sex parties are consensual and aim for everyone to embrace their sexual sides protectively. Due to this, guests feel free and empowered to venture into their interests and preferences, even bringing people along with them for their growth.

They can explore their sexuality without any judgment and also understand more about how different sexual activities work, which can serve as an educational experience for them. Learning the value of consent and communication while basking in more positive feelings during the event is also included.

5 They may have ethical exhibitionist and/or voyeuristic tendencies. 

Sex parties can mean that sex occurs in almost every corner of the space. As long as it’s safe and ethical, a lot of guests get aroused from either watching someone or a group of people doing the deed (voyeurism). Then there’s also another group who thrives on exposing themselves sexually (exhibitionism). Or maybe you could be both!

Types of Sex Parties

Disclaimer: We highlighted the ones that have been present now, so we apologize if we missed anything!

1 BDSM

Abbreviated from Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, Sadism, and Masochism, these kinds of sex parties venture through power dynamics, roleplay, and assorted types of kinks and fetishes. Instead of it being between 2 people, you’re with a community of people with a shared interest in BDSM. As much as possible, explore a sex party like this carefully. You can encounter kinks such as impact play, nipple play, and bondage.

2 Fetish/Kinky

This type of sex party revolves around a certain fetish or kink. People with a shared interest attend such a sex party to connect and explore the kink at their own pace and leisure. It’s also a way to celebrate their sexual interests, wherein there is no room for fetish or kink-shaming whatsoever.

3 Tantric

Most of the time, we venture through sex and its physical aspects. But through this kind of sex party, we focus more on deepening their spiritual and emotional connection, mindfulness, and sensuality. Guests are more eager to navigate their sensuality and sexuality mindfully and intentionally, enhancing their pleasure and intimacy. Some activities they can engage in are guided masturbation, mindful masturbation, and sensual touch.

4 Dress Code

Pretty self-explanatory, if you ask us. This type of sex party expects its guests to match the theme and atmosphere of the event. There are rules to follow in terms of its clothing options. That way, everyone can feel at ease and enjoy indulging in their desires freely. Depending on the organizers’ instructions, you can dress up (swimsuits, formal wear with masks, etc.) or dress down (aka full-on nudity).

5 Orgy

This type of sex party may just be the biggest one yet! Only the most daring can attend and joins its activities, wherein you can have full-blown sex with other singles and couples. But to be safe, limit the number of people you’re having sex with to lessen the risk of getting STDs. Stack up on condoms and hydrate as you keep up with the strong sexual energy in the air!

6 Hedonistic

A hedonistic sex party focuses on turning away from your inhibitions and ravel in physical pleasure and indulgence. There’s an emphasis on personal gratification as you engage in activities that please you. Ensure that you respect every participant during your pursuit.

7 Truth or Dare

Get bold and brash, especially when it comes to truth or dare! In this type of sex party, the guests engage in a sexy-themed game of Truth or Dare. You can have full-on candid questions about your sex life (Truth) or do wild actions (Dare). Singles and couples can engage in these sex parties, although there must be proper establishment of boundaries for the latter.

8 Roleplay

As the name suggests, it’s time to dress to impress as you take on specific characters and roles before performing sexual activities. You get to be a different persona for the night as you explore your fantasies, kinks, and fetishes. You can even follow a certain scenario in your mind! For example, you’re an innocent princess looking for a headstrong yet flirtatious knight who can teach her a thing about sex or two. It can go many ways, depending on what fantasies you have.

9 Swinger

Ready to swing from one person to another? This type of sex party consists of consensual sex activities with others, and its guests involve couples or singles. You can either swap partners or group sex activities. For example, a threesome or maybe being in the middle of a three-way makeout session.

10 LGBTQIA+/Queer 

This kind of sex party is open to those who identify in this diverse community, catered to venture their sexualities thoroughly and celebrate who they truly are. They also get to connect with more people like themselves in the community and express their desires freely and happily, ranging from casual, chill gatherings to more explicit ones.

11 Polyamory

If you’re in a polyamorous relationship, this kind of sex party is for you. Attending to this type allows you to meet and connect with more people in consensual polyamorous relationships and further gives you a sense of belonging.

12 Sex-Positive Gatherings

The only sex party where nobody does the deed but rather centers more on discussions about sex and everything else under its umbrella. That way, it can lessen the stigma surrounding sex and promote healthier habits and practices related to sex. That way, they can make smarter choices and decisions. 

People also get to open up and express their opinions on certain topics (relationships, sexuality, importance of consent, experiences, etc.) while also learning from others along the way.

How To Be A Host

Uncover what it takes to be a good and highly-trusted host of these fun sex parties through this informative section down below.

1 Be a consistent guest first.

Before taking on the biggest role, you must work your way from the bottom. With that being said, the best way to learn the ropes of a sex party is to learn how a sex party works. And in order to do that, you’re eager to attend various sex parties. Whether it be under the same theme or varying ones, you have more options regarding what types of sex parties you’d like to host in the future. Although the latter is more encouraged.

2 Build your circle.

As mentioned earlier as one of the top reasons why people like going to a sex party, you build community and connections in those events. With that being said, have them involved in your planning stage so you can have more minds working with you. Also, it’s a getaway to bring more light to certain kinds of sex parties or even bond more with your friends in the community.

3 Be aware of the law.

This tip is definitely the most crucial one. Wherever you live, it’s important to read up on the rules and regulations regarding sex work, adult entertainment, and sexual gatherings. It would help if you also complied with the needed legal requirements. That way, you and your guests won’t get into trouble.

4 Go hunting for prospect locations.

Sex parties are a safe place for most guests who want to express their sexual sides freely and happily. With that in mind, search for locations that are private and secure. It must also accommodate the number of people that you invite so everyone can have an equal share of the space to have sex or view it.

5 Invite the right number of guests for your sex party.

We think that starting small and intimate is a likely choice if you’re new to hosting sex parties. Or even if you’ve built your experience over time! But having too many people beyond your liking can create chaos and lessen the space around everyone. 

Nobody likes a cramped party, so perhaps stick to around 6-10 people. If ever you attend a sex party to watch and learn, it also won’t hurt to get a few more people who want to have sex towards the end. Then, regarding the guest’s identity, it’s a safe option to invite those you’re friends with and/or trust. If they’re anonymous to you, have a screening test to make sure they are reliable.

And it may also be of help to consider what guests you’d want to invite. Couples? Singles? Gays? It’ll depend on the type of party you’ll host or maybe your own preference since you’re the host.

6 Get creative about the theme or party you’d like to host.

We already gave you a whole section catered to the different types of sex parties. So it’s only a matter of time and interest on which one/s catches your interest the most. It’s either that or a theme that sparks to you a sense of belonging and community. As soon as you choose your desired theme, it’s time to plan and brainstorm possible activities surrounding it. 

7 Prioritize comfort and safety.

As the host of your sex party, you must provide your guests with basic amenities for a more comfortable experience. That ranges from food, refreshments, tissues, a place to relax after, or maybe extra bedrooms if possible.

Oop, lest we forget, provide condoms and lubricants so everyone having sex is doing it safely!

8 Set proper rules.

Once again emphasizing the importance of safety, setting rules ensures the fun of everyone while avoiding hurting anyone or any other bad scenario. One big rule to establish is getting consent (must be verbal as much as possible). Again, sex parties are consensual, so everyone must adhere to that. 

A few more important rules to uphold include being on their best behavior (start trouble or get kicked out), following the appropriate dress code (will be given ahead of time or upon getting an invite), and no online posting of any kind of content (to protect the privacy of everyone in the party).

9 Hire security.

Depending on how big the sex party is, getting security to watch over the guests can help you ensure everyone’s safety. As much as possible, the security must have an open mind on these things and shouldn’t be the ones harming the guests.

If there are security guards who’ve monitored sex parties before, it’s best to hire them when needed. Or perhaps confide in other sex party hosts for their referrals. Extra hosts and security can be assigned at different aspects of the party and have a clearer eye on the guests so they can fix any arising issues that occur mid-party to keep the event running smoothly.

10 Debrief with the guests.

As the sex party will eventually end, you can have a debriefing session with any other co-hosts to inspect what went right and what can be improved next time. Following up with guests the day or week after is also helpful so that you can get their feedback on the event from a guest’s perspective. 

Consider each piece of feedback and apply them in the succeeding sex parties you’ll hold.

Tips Before Attending a Sex Party

Let’s talk about a few key tips to remember before attending your first (or one of many) sex parties.

1 Do your research.

Before embarking on anything new, it’s important to do this tip so you know what to expect and how to prepare yourself. In the context of sex parties, you’re quite lucky to have come across this article from yours truly, but this shouldn’t be your only source! By doing more research, you’ll become more educated and aware of the atmosphere at these kinds of parties and further understand the importance of consent. 

You’re also more empowered to make genuine decisions that’ll benefit you and communicate your needs better as you safely venture through this event. Simultaneously, you respect those around you who are just as keen on a good time as you are.

2 Know your budget.

The prices of sex parties vary depending on the organizers and what they offer during those sex parties. For some, it can depend on whether you’re single, in a relationship, or a part of the LGBTQIA+ community. Like in the previous point, get deep into your research so you can find sex parties that can both fit your budget and your sexual preferences.

3 Get tested.

Sex parties ensure the safety of others while engaging in the deed if that’s your goal. Your own sexual health is included in such safety so that you don’t compromise the health of others along the way. It’s your responsibility to practice safe sex methods and to get tested often when you’re sexually active. In fact, showing your recent test results confirming a negative result should be in the screening test. 

Getting tested maintains the safe atmosphere of the party and avoids spreading any STDs in the process.

4 Figure out if you’re going alone or with another person.

Even if you’re single, perhaps a part of you would want to bring another person. But if not, that’s totally fine! We’re just considering all possible kinds of scenarios before attending sex parties. If you decide to go solo, you can navigate the event based on your individual sexual preferences and goals. 

Then if you go with someone, whether it be your partner or a friend, it requires more communication and establishing more boundaries with one another. At the same time, it lessens your fear of being vulnerable in case social gatherings can put you in a state of unease within the night. For the latter, it ensures that you and your companion are on the same page all throughout the event. We’re emphasizing the importance of respect and giving you both an equally fun experience at the sex party here.

5 Know your boundaries.

What are your soft boundaries, aka. the things you’re okay to engage in? How about the ones with a yellow flag, wherein it’s okay to a certain limit? Which things are your hard boundaries, aka. a major no-no when it comes to sex?

To know your boundaries, you need to check in with yourself and how you feel about various certain sexual activities. For example, you like to be degraded sexually but refuse to engage in impact play. 

Upon knowing your boundaries, voice them out beforehand so you can make smarter, more informed decisions within yourself and the person/s you participate in sexual activities with.

6 Dress or undress the part.

Sex parties have a dress code like other non-sexual parties, and it’s important to follow them. Or else you’d either get denied entry or feel awkward in the wrong clothes. A dress code is implemented to match the theme of the sex party and be one with the guests. 

For example, imagine going to a naked sex party but refusing to remove your clothes. Or maybe you attend a sex party where people dress up as their favorite animals, but you’re dressed casually. Quite unfair, right?

Aside from this, it makes those around you more comfortable and embodies the commitment and cooperation you have to these sex parties. It’s important to make a good first impression or generally be a good person in social gatherings.

Tips to Remember During a Sex Party

Now that you’ve arrived at your sex party, we have some pointers you may want to keep in mind as you navigate through the heated night ahead.

1 Respect your boundaries and those around you.

This tip ensures the safety of everyone, wherein their personal limits and comfort are honored and prioritized. By respecting such boundaries, you build trust between one another in those sex parties and encourage the importance of open communication. This way, you have healthier conversations with everyone and radiate positivity within the safe space.

Ask them kindly if you can touch them there or there. Never touch before asking, and be firm and direct with each other. That way, you can avoid misunderstandings and arguments to ensue.

2 Avoid getting too wasted.

Nothing good comes from being too intoxicated. That means you lack responsibility in following your tolerance. 

You’re more prone to making poorly thought-out decisions when under the influence. Like okay, one drink is okay for liquid courage and all. But going beyond what you can handle has no free pass. You must be in control and aware of your surroundings the entire time you’re at the party. Your ability to learn and uphold other people’s boundaries is compromised by substances such as drugs and alcohol.

And at the same time, don’t sleep with someone who is clearly intoxicated. It’s also advisable to have at least one person in the room who is completely sober. It can either be the host or an assigned person by the host.

3 No is a full sentence.

What else is left there to say about this point? If someone makes a move on you, but you don’t want to engage, telling them no should give them the idea to back off or step away. Or if you want to pursue someone, but they aren’t interested and decline, take their answer as is and move on to the next person. If chaos ensues from this, the perpetrator will be barred or kicked out from the sex party as they violate the rules of respecting people and making the sex party a safe space.

So don’t be an a-hole, and also don’t let an a-hole there get away with their mischief.

4 Take breaks.

A sex party can be tiring if your end goal has been engaging in the deed the whole night. So in between rounds, take a breather to unwind and recompose your thoughts. At sex parties, there may be a place where you can just chill and enjoy the refreshments offered. You can talk to other guests who are taking a break or simply present to watch as well. 

In case there is no such a spot, you can kindly ask the host if there’s a private spot or place for you to rest momentarily before getting back in the game. If you’re with friends, it’s ideal to have an exit strategy just in case of a situation with another person or the sex party as a whole. It can be through a special code word or a non-verbal cue.

5 Manage your expectations.

If you’re attending your first sex party, don’t expect it to be the most mindblowing, perfect experience. There, we won’t sugarcoat it. But at the same time, respect and consent must be present during your first time experience at a sex party. Whether you’re attending as a guest eager for a good time or as a spectator of the event overall.

But focusing more on the former, let it be known that rejection can happen. If you find someone intriguing for a good time, for them to say no is possible. And it shouldn’t be taken personally either. But it can happen in the opposite direction, wherein you turn down people’s invitations for certain sexual activities. This is great for building character and further respecting one another.

On another note, finding a partner here is as difficult as finding a partner in a non-sexual setting. Everyone here is looking for sex, not a relationship. Knowing these things beforehand can spare you from disappointment and discomfort, allowing you to focus on other fun matters during sex parties instead.

6 Practice safe sex!

Never not gonna preach this! Most sex parties provide condoms and lubricants but always bring your own in case. If you want sex toys involved:

1. Bring your own for hygienic purposes.
2. Constantly clean your sex toys and change condoms after usage so you can reuse them.
3. Never use other people’s sex toys without their permission.
4. Practice good manners, everyone.

7 Follow the sex party rules.

Each sex party has its own set of rules that they’ll let you know beforehand. But definitely, respecting boundaries, practicing safe sex, and giving consent must be non-negotiables. Though just keep in mind that there are also some unspoken rules that you should figure out on your own or perhaps ask your friends. Or maybe research online for other people’s experiences!

The rules of the sex party are there to maintain peace, order, and comfort for every guest at sex parties. You would also promote a more positive experience for everyone wherein they can freely venture their desires and also minimize or have no conflicts all throughout the event. It’s all about mutual respect and responsibility for our actions and building trust within the community.

Tips to Remember After Attending a Sex Party

As you unwind from all that sexual intensity, you should do it correctly! Skim through this short section on how to accomplish just that. 

1 Clean up after yourself.

Sex can get really messy and sweaty right after, so what more if you’re at a party dedicated to it? Cleaning up after yourself post-sex parties maintains one’s overall hygiene and prevent health and hygiene issues from possibly starting and spreading. As for the event itself, it gives respect and consideration to the organizers and other guests in keeping the venue orderly. You help ensure that the venue is suitable for future sex parties.

2 Reflect on your experience.

If it’s your first time attending a sex party, ask yourself your thoughts on the event. 

Did you have fun? 

What things would you do again? 

How about the activities that are on your pass list? 

Are there new things would you want to delve into next time? 

These questions also apply when you become more regular and consistent in these sex parties. They’re for your personal growth, fostering more positive attitudes and thoughts towards your sexuality. They can also help you establish firmer boundaries and communicate with others better at your next sex parties. Plus, it’ll make you feel more fulfilled with your sex life.

3 Plan ahead for your next sex party. 

It’s always better to prepare early than not! If you have plans on going to more sex parties in the future, planning ahead prepares you beforehand and allows you to create more-well thought decisions moving forward. You’d be able to address your boundaries and needs better when you figure out exactly what they are from your reflections based on the previous point. Another pro to this tip would be having clearer direction during sex parties and feeling more confident and aware of your every move.

Takeaway

Sex parties are unique gatherings that allow one to express their deepest sexual desires with other people. There are many types to choose from, depending on where you are most interested. As long you and everyone else prioritize consent, safety, and mutual respect, sex parties are safe spaces for everyone.