We hear the term “fisting” tossed around quite a bit, especially when it comes to sex. But ask around, and you’ll find that not many people really know what it entails. Today, we’re here to clear up some of the misconceptions and share the essential info you need to understand this type of play. That way, if you decide to explore it, you can do so safely and confidently.
What is Fisting?
Fisting involves you or your partner slowly inserting the entire hand, with all five fingers, into the vagina or rectum, often forming a fist—hence the name. This act creates a sensation of extreme fullness and intense pressure on areas like the G-spot or A-spot, which some people find incredibly pleasurable. With the whole hand inside, multiple areas are stimulated simultaneously, heightening the experience.
This sexual practice can be approached in two different ways, depending on the area being penetrated. First, there’s vaginal fisting, where the vagina is being entered. The fister can either insert a clenched fist or keep the fingers straight and grouped closely together, depending on the comfort and preference of the receiver.
The other, more commonly known type, is anal fisting. Here, the fister penetrates the anus. Just like with vaginal fisting, the hand’s shape can vary based on what the receiver finds most comfortable. The key aspect of both types is that all five fingers are inserted.
Debunking Common Fistconceptions
Fisting is not usually discussed in mainstream media, and that’s most likely why there are so many misconception about it. Here are a few myths we’re debunking about this niche sexual play.
1“Fisting is not intimate and is outright unhygienic.”
Fisting can affect different people in different ways. It can be primal for some, and spiritual for other. Fisting allows the individual to experience the limits of human physical pleasure. While there is some initial discomfort that happens during fisting, there are infinite possibilities for pleasure, and with this come the potential for deeper connections with your partner.
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2“Fisting will permanently destroy your butt.”
Some people believe that anal fisting can can use permanent damage by tearing or stretching the tissue there. However, you should know that the tissue around that area is very elastic and in order to make anal fisting comfortable, the receiver must intentionally relax their muscles. Getting fisted can make you extremely vulnerable, and this can open you up toa more trascendental sexual experience.
3“Fisting causes constipation.”
It’s a myth that fisting causes constipation, of course, along with anal sex being inherently dangerous. If a person suffers from constipation, that should be addressed and not blamed on any anal sexual activity.
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4“Fisting makes you loose.”
Getting loose down there can’t be attributed solely to fisting. Stretching muscles allow them to stretch further over time, but it still contracts to normal. Muscles are, after all, elastic. If you stop stretching those muscles, they eventually lose the ability to stretch that far and you will need to work back up to being able to take a fist again.
5“Like porn…You don’t need much foreplay when fisting.”
Remember that porn is fictional and they cut out a lot of the foreplay! Making sure you’re extremely aroused and ready for fisting can take anywhere from 20 minutes to an hours. It all depends on what you and your partner are planning to do.
How to Practice Fisting
Thinking about trying anal or vaginal fisting? Here are the basic steps to keep in mind for your first time.
It’s important that fisting is done with someone who already has experience with vaginal or anal penetration. If you’re new to penetration, it’s best to start with more beginner-friendly activities like fingering or using sex toys. Take your time and ease into it!
1Get ready with some prep.
All sexual activities require some preparation, but fisting might need a bit more attention. Here’s what you’ll need:
- Personal Lubricant – Opt for something with a thick consistency, like fisting lube, silicone-based, or water-based lube.
- Latex or Nitrile Gloves – Worn by the fister for hygiene and safety.
- Condoms – Use for anal or vaginal sex and wrap around any sex toys you’re using.
- Towels & Wet Wipes – Essential for any messy mishaps.
- Sex Toys – Perfect for warming up the vagina or anus or for stimulating other pleasure zones.
- Scented Candles – Adds a calming effect in the room.
Aside from gathering the necessary items, ensure you and your partner prep your bodies. The fister should trim, clean, and file their nails to avoid cuts or injuries. For the receiver, especially with anal fisting, adjusting the diet can help minimize mess. Adding insoluble fibers like brown rice, potatoes, green beans, cauliflower, nuts, and wheat bran can be beneficial.
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2Start with a warm-up.
Essentials are prepped, you’ve set aside enough time, and distractions are cleared—now it’s time to dive into the sensual session.
Remember, fisting isn’t something you can rush. Stretching the vagina or anus wide takes time, and going straight in could lead to discomfort or even injury. So, it’s crucial for the fister to help the receiver relax and get warmed up. This can include:
- Making Out
- Watching Porn
- Fingering
- Oral Sex
- Sensual Massage
- Light Spanking
- Sex Toy Play
- Penetrative Sex
These are just some ideas—feel free to adjust based on what you and your partner enjoy. You can also add some kinks, like BDSM or roleplaying, to spice things up. Just ensure the foreplay is long enough to get the receiver in the right mood.
The more aroused your partner is, the more lubricated and, thus, accommodating their body will be to your hand. The uterus even lifts into the pelvic cavity for women, leaving more room in the vaginal canal. In addition to the physiological changes that occur during foreplay, it can also help your partner be open and relaxed enough to take your fisting session.
3Use plenty of lube.
Ready for some naughty fisting? Before you start, wear your gloves, then apply a generous amount of lubricant. You’ll be inserting something quite large into the vagina or anus, so extra glide and cushioning are essential to minimize any pain or discomfort.
For a smoother experience, go with a lube specifically designed for fisting or choose a silicone-based one. These tend to be thicker than water-based lubes, so you’ll need less reapplication and can enjoy more fun. Just remember, if you’re using silicone toys, opt for a lube that’s safe for silicone.
4Ease into full insertion.
After applying a generous amount of lube to your hand, start by gently massaging the opening.
Begin with one finger, moving it back and forth and swirling it inside. Once you’ve eased into that, add a second finger and continue the same motions to stimulate the pleasure zones. Pay close attention to your partner’s reactions as you explore their anus or vagina. If they’re enjoying it, let them know when you add a third finger and gently push it in.
When you’re ready to insert all five fingers, start by positioning your hand in a duck shape (with the tips of your fingers pressed together) before pushing it in. Once inside, you can gently clench your fingers to enhance that fuller fisting sensation.
Check in with your partner throughout the session and reapply lubricant as needed. Their comfort and safety are your top priorities, so if something seems off—like immense pain or bleeding—stop immediately and seek medical advice if necessary. As for the receiver, communicate what feels good and what doesn’t. Let your partner know the sensations, and be clear about what you need—whether to go slower, move more gently, stop, or even pull back out.
5Gently pull out when you’re done.
When you notice your partner reaching climax, don’t pull your hand out too fast, especially after an orgasm. This is a common beginner mistake. It can be very painful if you pull out too fast after your partner has had an orgasm.
Keep in mind that you will not be able to pull out your hand while it is still in a fist. You will have to go back to the duck position to slide out and pull it out slowly to prolong your partner’s climax. Trust us. They’re going to love it if you do this. Afterward, do a quick cleanup, then settle in for some nice pillow talk or post-deed cuddles.
Risks
Wondering what possible risks one could get from this activity? Here are some of the things to consider.
1Sexually Transmitted Infections
If the person being fisted is positive for HIV or Hepatitis C, there’s a risk of transmission if their anal mucus or blood comes into contact with any cuts or sores on the fister’s hand. Although the likelihood is low, it’s best to ensure everyone’s comfort and safety by wearing heavy-duty nitrile or latex gloves. Additionally, fisting can sometimes lead to vaginal or anal sex, and unprotected sex carries the risk of sexually transmitted infections (STIs). Always have condoms on hand to keep both you and your partner protected.
2Injuries
Careful attention is needed to avoid injuring the receiver’s vagina or anus. Not trimming and filing your nails properly can lead to cuts on the sensitive walls of these areas, so be sure to keep your nails well-maintained to prevent any harm. The fister should always be gentle to maintain the receiver’s comfort.
Safety Tips When Trying Fisting
Now that we’ve got the myths and basic steps out of the way, it’s time to tackle the things you should know about fisting. Ready? Let’s begin!
1Familiarize yourself with human sexual anatomy.
Understand human anatomy to protect yourself and your partner. We aren’t saying you have to go and become a doctor, but having an idea of all the important tissues and organs down there can definitely help you practice fisting safely. Here’s a thorough reading on the female and male sexual anatomy. And if you’re an audiovisual learner, here’s a crash course video on the female and male reproductive systems.
2Don’t try to emulate what you see in porn.
Porn stars are practiced and they do not do a scene without knowing how to do it well – even though what they show you on screen can make it seem different. Your fisting experience may be different from what you see on screen, but that doesn’t make it a failed experience.
3Start small.
You learn fisting with butt plugs that gradually get you comfortable with the feeling of stretching your anal sphincter. Your muscles should get accustomed to this feeling and enjoy it before you work up to larger insertables. And then — and only then — can you start playing with fingers.
Plus, you may even find that the stretching process can be more fun than the actual fisting. You could also be surprised at how supple your skin is and how much you can do once you train your muscles to relax.
4It’s okay to try multiple attempts.
It may take you multiple attempts to achieve good fisting. Remember that the goal of fisting is to reach pleasure, so enjoy the journey as you go along. You can practice with dildos for vaginal play and anal beads to practice the bum for actual fisting.
5Take frequent breaks.
If you’re not enjoying your initial sessions, cool it. Taking breaks can help you regain energy so you can enjoy the upcoming sensations much more. Even if you’ve been fisting for a while, it’s good to take frequent breaks — and sometimes necessary. Give your body and holes a rest.
6Talk to fisters you know, they can share helpful input too!
Naturally, those who are into fisting love to chat about it. A close friend might have valuable tips or insights that could be really helpful. People often claim to have the perfect lube formula—many are convinced their blend is the best, but only a few are good enough to be adopted as go-tos.
Along with lube recommendations, you’ll also hear about various toys and buddy referrals. The fisting community is pretty tight-knit, and sharing advice and experiences is part of what makes it so supportive and informative.
7Have a talk about each other’s bodies, yes even the messy parts.
As a beginner, you may be afraid of getting some poop remnants while doing fisting. Ask most beginners what terrifies them the most and they’ll say how they are terrified of “not being clean.” It’s a butt. You can clean for hours and will never eliminate all traces of fecal matter from your rectum, and you shouldn’t try to. It’s not safe or healthy to overclean down there too. Talk about your body, your diet, and your cleaning regimen with other fisters. Talk about using the bathroom.
And if you’d want to be thorough with cleaning the backdoor, try anal douching. Everyone who fists must get comfortable around these more intimate, messy realities of our lives. Eventually, you will reach a point where you are less afraid of the body and how it works.
8Practice mindfulness.
Meditation and mindfulness practices are great ways to help your breathing. Take time to “check in” with your body, relieve stress, and make yourself relax. We suggest you incorporate tantric sex and yoni massage in your sexual plays if you’d want to take mindfulness a step further. Not only is meditation a great idea for juggling the stresses and pressures of daily life — it also helps in the handballing (fisting) department.
9Always do it while you’re sharp and sober.
Playing drunk or high can mask your ability to feel pain and recognize when you’ve had enough, which can lead to injury or overexertion. While drinking may seem appealing for various types of sex, including fisting, masking pain is risky because it’s your body’s way of telling you to stop.
When you’re new to fisting, it’s best to practice sober so you can understand the natural sensations. It may take more time and effort without substances, but it’s worth it to build up your skills safely.
10It helps to practice aftercare.
The receiver may feel sore after a fisting session, so keep in mind that this can be an intense experience. Be available for connection, closeness, and holding. Checking up on each other will help you both assess what just took place, what made you turned on, and what didn’t work. Plus, practicing aftercare will be a great moment for intimacy and openness for couples.
Top Lauvette Fisting Essentials
Here are some essential items and tips to help you navigate fisting safely and comfortably:
Takeaway
Fisting is great for those who thoroughly enjoy the sensation of full penetration, and it can be a great mode of sexploration for you and your partner. As long as you follow the points in this article and practice safety, both of you will be enjoying fisting in no time!
Share this article with your partner and try out the pleasures brought by fisting! And for more guides like this, visit this page for more.
